Reunited..

The house we live in is two stories, both with kitchens, living rooms, bathrooms, bedrooms...  But we live on the upper part.  All of us.  We use the bottom floor as like the kitchen and living room, but we don't really use that living room.  July 30th marked the 6 month anniversary of Kevin and I breaking up.  I had decided on June 30th, when Meghan, Arianna and myself were quietly riding back to South Carolina after the viewing of Liz's body, that if nothing happen between Kevin and I by July 30th, I was waving my white flag.  Done. 

And this decision didn't waver.  If anything, I almost wanted to just move down sooner than the 30th.  I went back and forth on if I wanted to do that or not, but always deciding that no, I had decided on the 30th, so the 30th it was.

But then earlier this week, I think around the 27th or so, I was laying in bed, almost drifting to sleep, when I heard a voice in my head telling me to wait until August 2nd.  You know how sometimes you'll "hear" voices, just yourself making yourself "hear" them?  Well, I'm sure that's what I was doing, but it sounded exactly like Liz.  Telling me to wait until August 2nd.  So I waited.....   

I had been working on something I wanted to tell Kevin...just things that I've been wanting to tell him, and didn't want to forget or leave out.  This morning, I woke up with a heavy heart.  Nothing had happen, and I knew that I was going to be moving downstairs.  I was completely depressed and bummed out...and then around 6ish, I began to cry, and just spilled my guts to Kevin.  I told him I was moving downstairs and he said something like stop making it so stressful on him and myself...  So I told him I was going for a walk...that I had a note on the computer for him, things that I had wanted to actually say, but I knew I would start crying, so if he wanted to read it, go ahead.  And then I went for a slow walk around my neighborhood.  When I came back home, I cleaned up around the living room downstairs, or rather, got things ready for my things when I brought them down.  But honestly, I was just avoiding going upstairs and seeing Kevin....but then after about an hour or so, my phone began to die, so I went up to get the charger.  I figured while I was up there, I would also bring my pillows back down too....   I go upstairs, and Kevin pops up from his computer chair real fast to give me a hug and says scoldingly (but in a playful way), "Where have you been?!"  I reached for my pillow and he said, "What are you doing?"  And I just looked at him... I didn't even know what to say.  I had literally asked him to read a note, telling him what I was doing, but he pushed the pillow out of my hand.  And he tells me he read the letter I wrote him.  And then he starts talking, saying something that I know is going to end with he thinks me moving downstairs is for the best too...but instead he ends it with saying he wanted us to get back together.....

So yea...  We're together again.  :)    But this time, I'm wiser.  And stronger.